heirdo's New Writeups

You Made The Sunrise, You Were The Fall (personal)

2010-01-29T20:19:15Z

... every so often, I stumbled on simple words while we spoke. Internally, the pounding of my chest attuned itself to a din not unlike John Bonham's kit during the introductory measures of When The Levee Breaks. Your presence could immediately break my concentration, just as your silence ultimately did to my heart. Whether by will or incidental circumstance, the synchronicity of our daily movements were simply another element of how thoroughly enchanting you were to me. I looked forward to seeing your dark auburn hair reflect the morning sun as we exited elevators; I miss your gaze through the layers upon layers of eyeliner which still couldn't hide the brightness of your eyes in the light... at least in my own.

I know these words come as no surprise, but now my intention is simply to let you know that I am still haunted. Perhaps I should have known from the way…

Revolution No.O (personal)

2009-12-20T23:31:29Z

... it was just a typical night in July of 2000. My friend Nate and I, both nineteen, wasted our nights away in the crotch-like atmospheric conditions of summertime by the gulf, traversing the ghetto which flanked the perimeter of the University of Houston. As if stepping into another dimension, there were an abundance of bodegas whose operators were quite cordial, selling baby-faced white boys from the suburbs myriad varieties of malt liquor and fruit-flavored blunts.

In contrast, the particular suburb where we went to high school prohibited selling 40 oz bottles of beer; moreover, we literally had to cross the tracks into a neighboring municipality to acquire rolling papers. Therefore, when Nate's roommates were around, listening to songs from TV commercials downloaded from Napster and watching hentai movies, we'd stockpile our imbibes and head to our respective parents places in the 'burbs.

2000 was a year of great…

November 15, 2009 (personal)

2009-11-16T19:25:21Z

5:32 AM: Startled awake by exploding head syndrome. I am fully dressed, sitting upright on my couch. In one hand, an uncapped black Sharpie is gently dangling from my left hand. A de facto hoist exists in the form of my stereo's remote control, prohibiting my jacket from syphoning a pool of permanent black ink. The pen has gone dry regardless. It's the third I've lost this week, alone. My spiral notebook is nowhere to be found, so I reach for the Moleskine on my side table. Subsequent examination reveals a faded and crudely scrawled message to no one; hence, my assumption is that the intended addressee is either God or myself to read in a fully-awakened state. Consisting of only two words, the second of which being "off," brevity will later prove apt and effective.
5:39 AM: Shuffle through my bathroom drawer for old Trazadone prescription. Planning to spend the day in a coma, I retrieve spare set of dark brown sheets from linen closet.

…

November 14, 2009 (log)

2009-11-14T15:25:06Z

Ask the dealership for an overnight test-drive. Newer black 5-series. They said "okay".
Stop at the Four Seasons; enter the sparsely populated dining room and begin playing the Kawai grand piano. Notice grim faces on large silver-haired men in suits entering the room. They speak to one another on their headsets, although they are no more than ten feet apart. Grim faces soon beget pleasant acceptance and jovial conversation. An older woman draped in a black couture dress and a dense batch of rhinoplasty reaches for her Sasquatched husband for a quick tango towards the exit; his plodding feet just trudge along and out the glass door.
Step out and up the marv white marble staircase with gold anodized handrail fixed-against a beveled mirror which almost obtrusively reflects faux gas lights which beam from the numerous Dynasty chandeliers. It's quite a tasteful array of mauve and teal furniture juxtaposed against gilt lanterns and an atrium…

November 10, 2009 (personal)

2009-11-10T20:32:03Z

When we speak to one another, in my mind I take cognitive precautions not to sound like a horny, gaked-out Pat O'Brien blathering into his mistresses answering machine. Abdominal constrictions and temporal excretions pump fresh blood and serotonin, and my breath staggers in the aim of your frost-blue eyes. I watch your pupils dilate and inflame like a concerted stargazer when you laugh; your gaze pierces with a feather-tipped suction dart.

Yet my mind's eye disallows view at the axis of desire's center. Close enough to feel your warm breath whisper secrets into my ear; all the while I am physically paralyzed in this state. Physicality is not of my choice - though I fathom luminescent, twisting souls and thundering orgasmic death-rattles. A forced-hand prohibition on touch, though I'd give away my stained-glass heart just to stroke your milky skin...…