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Emergency Burger King maneuver, or: Sliding around a Tri-Met bus

created by wonko

(idea) by wonko (1.2 y) (print)   ?   (I like it!) 1 C! Sun May 27 2001 at 1:40:21

My roommates and I were on our way home after dropping by an appliance store to look at refrigerators. I was driving, as usual, since my Subaru Impreza WRX has plenty of seats. It had been a while since I had eaten, but Lillis and Tabor (the aforementioned roommates) weren't hungry. I decided to make a stop at a Burger King further down the road.

As I approached Burger King I was traveling in the right lane of a four-lane road (two lanes each way). To my dismay, a huge lumbering TriMet bus in front of me had stopped to pick up passengers just before the turn-in to Burger King. As I approached it, the bus turned on its left blinker and yield sign and began to merge back into traffic.

At this point, I was going approximately 60 miles per hour and was far too close to the bus to even consider stopping in time, much less making the turn into Burger King. So I made a command decision.

I make it a habit to constantly check my mirrors, so I always know who's beside me or behind me. I knew nobody was on my left as I had checked just seconds before, so I swung the car into the left lane, zipped past the merging bus, slammed the steering wheel back to the right (no time for brakes), and induced a very noisy, very amazing power-slide that shot me neatly in front of the bus and right into the Burger King entrance.

Amid startled "yelp!" noises from my roommates, I checked my rear-view mirror to make sure the bus driver hadn't done anything rash like locking up his brakes (he hadn't), and then I entered the drive-thru and ordered a Double Whopper with Cheese, french fries, and a medium Coke.

I love my car. That said, what I did was stupid and illegal, and I wouldn't do it again.

Back to Highway Tales


printable version
chaos

Highway Tales Subaru Impreza WRX So much for the nodegel Standards Committee. Do not have sex with horses. Seriously, don't.
Stupid people TriMet Yield sign shell-shocked
McDonald's Jean-Luc Picard Working for the defense industry Words that sound dirty but really aren't
Antiburgher scratchpad Burger King No Live Nude Lesbians were harmed in the rescuing of this nodeshell
Carl's Jr. Family Guy It's a fair cop McFeast
drive-thru Coke bus Roommate
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