From the Book of Dolemite, Chapter 5:
8 And the LORD did standeth up before the multitudes, and He blessed them, saying, "Lo, my children, truly I say unto thee, I am getting mighty tired of those fuckin' Pharisees, for they art a bunch of pig-fuckers and stoat-gobblers.
9 "For truly the day is coming when the Son of God is going to poppeth a cap in they gaddamn asses. Then shall the Kingdom of Heaven rejoice.
10 "Can I get a 'Hell, yeah!'"
11 And the multitudes didst whoop and holler righteously, for it is written, the Lamb of God will chase down the iniquitous and go to town on them as they bleat for mercy and crap themselves without measure.
12 For He has promised to hunt down the enemies of Israel and beat on them with His big-ass ball-peen hammer, see if He don't.
13 And then a Samaritan asked the LORD, "Teacher, shall we not love our enemies and strive to bring peace and love to the world, so to bring all peoples into the Temple?"
14 And Jesus did stand up and gaze upon the Samaritan and yell, "Fuckin' hell, it's one of those fucking Samaritans! Kick the fucker's ass!"
15 And thus did the people rise up and busteth his bod. And the LORD did help himself to a 40. |
