Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "Amazing what kind of yarn you can spin when you have more than an hour to tell your story"

• The Library Book
• old books can tell more than one story
• When I tell stories about you I have to use my hands
• To tell the truth I am never happier than when I am a kangaroo
• I can only pray that, when I finally leave, I will have done little enough damage to be totally forgotten
• Trying to keep up with technology, when the quiet full moon is momentarily more than enough
• Being accurate about the small things is more important than getting the story fundamentally right
• the summer can do little more than feed itself
• Prices should have no more than 2 significant digits
• I have more stories about trains for you
• Some vampires actually get pissed when you tell them to Have A Nice Day
• there is a place where the dead live. it is in us. it is all around us. it is more than we can understand.
• You can no more win a war, than an Earthquake
• The one thing I wanted more than anything was for someone, just once, to tell me they don't know what they'd do without me
• when there's more hair on the floor than on one's head
• When two legs are worth more than gold
• How can something be more beautiful than it is?
• Who needs love when you can have death?
• dr's Hospital Adventure : nurses put up with more than you can ever realize
• On a clear day you can see more than you want to
• A thousand years from now, we should have coffee and tell stories while the world disintegrates
• malt does more than Milton can to justify God's ways to man
• Even the tides have more friends than you
• A story about a picture can only say so much, even in a thousand words or more
• How to tell when you have really messed up your relationship
• try to memorize this moment so that years from now I can tell the story of it
• Americans have more than 40 words for boobies
• Shall I tell you stories of other stars: stars that you love, that deserve your love. Stars that do not disappoint, and disgust, and disgrace your love. Oh, I have hope they exist for your sake!
• Cookies have more calories than TNT
• She may be pretty and have more money than me but she doesn't write songs about you.
• When is a monkey's orgasm more than just fun and games?
• Why I trust myself more than I trust the government when it comes to my health.
• Side effects include explosive acne, terminal constipation, loss of extremities, uncontrollable pyrokinesis, and erections lasting more than four hours due to rigor mortis.
• Up, because the sky has room for us and more than we can ever make
• How to get Apache to tell your visitors when files have moved or been deleted
• I'll pretend I just cursed myself by saying this, so when it doesn't happen I have something to fall back on other than you
• Years from now I can tell the story of it
• It takes more than good memory to have good memories
• i can feel your ghost when i'm alone
• we have learned all that we can from anal probing
• I have a small penis. How can I sexually pleasure a woman?
• When you have a trip planned, but don't go, you need to cancel your reservations
• Do female homosexuals have it easier than male homosexuals?
• I may have cellulite, but I can still put my ankles behind my head
• Taking a wrong turn in Connecticut can be worse than you think
• How can a man stand when they cut off his feet?
• Who needs another person when you have yourself?
• Warmer winds than this have frozen sunnier days
• you can heal? you have to rest.
• Amazing what you can do with a paperclip and a snapped elastic band
• Having gotten myself into a position where I can have my cake and eat it too, I feel a strong compulsion to get up from the table
• Things that can go wrong when assembling a computer
• I can no longer tell you
• The amazing true story of how I became the sixth Backstreet Boy
• Why would he want a writer when he could have a dancer?
• When people ask "Where are you from?" I have to think for a minute
• if you're going to pontificate, can I at least have a drink
• blondes have more fun
• I have always imagined that Paradise will be a kind of library
• Amazing Stories
• What kind of year have YOU had?
• When I have Fears that I may Cease to Be
• Even a Doll Can Seem To Have a Soul
• How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You're Not Anywhere at All?
• When we kiss I can hear your thoughts, so I would rather we didn't
• When you are drunk, all you can see is light
• Can God create a boulder so large He can't have anal sex with it?
• I have to get up early and do laundry so I can wear something nice to the weirdo sex club
• I'll keep calligraphy (you can have the flying spaghetti monster)
• when you're done, you can let her die if that's what you want. Or you can wake her.
• The smell of kittens that have been careless; the flowers and the beer cans emerging from the snow.
• That icky feeling when a client calls with a downed server and you have no clue how to fix it
• Having an S on a transcript rather than a B
• I have never felt more alive
• Who needs genetic cloning when we have The Gap?
• I'd tell you but then I'd have to kill you
• When you move here we will have plenty of time to have fun together
• You should have killed me when you had the chance
• When a boy comes over, always have something baking
• I would have liked thunder when she left
• For White Girls Who Have Considered Afro Hair Products/When the Conditioner is Enuf
• The people we have met in the last 5 years, & will we remember them in 10 more
• You never can tell
• Can I have a light?
• Now he can be loved. Now he is no more.
• only cold little handheld mirrors in the wee hours of the morning can be trusted
• Every time that I tell her that I love her, I can taste my own hypocrisy
• How to tell she's good looking
• you tell me i live in a malady called imagination and i only can laugh
• Some days are magic, and I can do anything. The other days, I just have to wait, and hope it comes back.
• I can feel the heat coming off my neck when I think too hard.
• it went like this, as near as anybody can tell
• My finger can point to the moon, but my finger is not the moon. You don't have to become my finger, nor do you have to worship my finger. You have to forget my finger, and look at where it is pointing.
• Have you ever wondered how many gears a car can have? Or: My experiences with an East German vehicle
• i've never wanted to die, only things i can never have
• Bragging about a high IQ is way worse than bragging about having a large dick. The latter can at least be demonstrably used for something and be put to good use.
• Only when you can accept the pain does it start to fade. That's what healing is.
• Things you can tell just by looking at him
• One of the most irritating things that can happen when talking
• There are worse things than to have a great injustice done to you
• When we have reached the end of time and light
• Times when you MUST have a smoke
• Laugh when you have been listening well
• For future reference, when in eternity or insanity; dreams I would like to have
• I have children; therefore I am better than you
• When they say "Gotta have it!" they mean it!
• You just have to tell me these things, okay?
• Stoned music memories
• I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy
• I can lick 30 tigers today! And other stories
• Girls who tell you they have a boyfriend
• Penises have higher bandwidth than cable modems
• When I too long have looked upon your face,
• Guys who don't tell you they have a girlfriend
• Please sir, may I have some more?
• The more you promote something, the less of it you have
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• It's better to be heartbroken than to have a heart not worth breaking
• The Story of Augustus who not have any Soup
• A time when a gun might have been helpful
• It would have been an excellent story but I had to get off the train
• Maybe now that I have written this all down I can finally sleep
• You can pulp a story but you cannot destroy an idea.
• I can degrade myself better than you can
• Sometimes when I hold a child I can feel my life grow long
• How can an atheist have morals?
• You can tell a lot about a person from their e-mail address
• Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
• When water chokes you
• How can I talk about love when the bacon is burned and the house is an absolute mess and the children are screaming their heads off and I'm going to miss my bus?
• you never can tell with bees
• God, do you think I can have a nephew this time?
• How can I need kisses I have never felt?
• No one can know what you want unless you tell them
• Piero Manzoni
• You can tell a Marine
• The kinds of friends I can change my clothes in front of
• I can break into any Ford Expedition in an hour
• I miss you can I have the ground back now
• i can tell you the dreaming up north is real and wide
• at least in dreams when shit gets ugly you can still fly and whistle
• Come the Rapture, Can I have your Car?
• from where I stand I can see they have already won
• You can have great armfuls of just such roses as these.
• What can be better than that?
• You can tell what state a relationship is in by the type of underwear the girl is wearing
• Can I tell you how much I want to smoke you, like this cigarette?
• When you can almost recognize her face, but you can't remember her name
• I know it's stealing, but sometimes someone else can say it better than you ever can.
• Can I have your autograph? (category)
• We celebrate the holidays when we can. In the ways we can afford to.
• Don't stop. You can sleep when you're dead.
• The video cuts out here; nothing more can be determined from the tape.
• I can eat a peach for hours
• Always talk to dead people when you can. Always.
• Only in the dark can we see the lives we have lost
• How much more can we bear?
• Why respect knights, when my potions can do anything that you can?
• Having knowledge is not the same as having understanding. You can have all the pieces in front of you and still not be able to put the puzzle together.
• I cannot produce a definitive list of everywhere I have been, but I can say that I have seen a whole lot of nowhere
• Don't try to make the moment last. You can ruin it that way. Just learn to savor it and, when the time comes, learn how to let it go.
• You can still be very hurtful when you do what's right.
• you can look closer forever and there is always more
• it is a new dawn and I am a new me, this you can have if you want
• This is immensely rewarding when successful, but can be an extremely intensive and difficult thing to develop and practice
• it's a pity we only appreciate some once they're gone, when they can no longer defend themselves
• Redemption is very much like vengeance. Redemption has more valor, and is more satisfying if you obtain it. But if you chase it blindly you can waste yourself completely.
• If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about answers.
• Mister Obama can I have a pony
• When I have female children
• Here's Me Inside Her But I Can Tell From Her Vagina She Doesn't Really Care
• Things you can tell just by looking at her
• When words fail me, music helps. I can at least sing along.
• How can I comfort you when it breaks me too?
• When will you humans learn that your "feelings" (as you so call them) can stand in the way of big cash payoffs?
• Can we have a metaphysics of frogs?

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