An elite squadron of urban operatives with one mission: to silence the Harley-Davidson motorcycles by the secret affixing of super-efficient carbon fibre tungsten-depleted uranium space-age mufflers (originally designed for NASA, natch) with a combination of super glue, arc welding, duct tape and God's fiery wrath. The first target will be those ridden by people who think it's a great idea to bang someone's eardrums with a sonic hammer; those who think it's a great idea to do this between the hours of midnight and dawn will have the muffler attached to their brain as well. (Somewhere in this paragraph the phrases "with extreme prejudice" and "by any means necessary" should be inserted.)

I swear to God, one of these days I'm going to start doing this.