I, however, use the term Poppy-Seed Muffin to describe a false positive on gaydar. He acts gay, he looks gay. He is *SO* gay, you say to yourself. Wait a minute! What's this?! He's married?! He's got kids? Maybe just a girlfriend? He swears up and down that he worships the vagina... but something inside tells you that this Molly is in gay denial. Your gaydar proceeds to short out and explode from the confusion. Lord HELP you if you hit on a Poppy-Seed Muffin, as he's likely gotten it before, and will already have the pent-up aggression and insecurity in him to go Richard Simmons on the next gay ass that doesn't see him as 100% GRADE-A, EXIT-ONLY, BONAFIDE STRAIGHT MAN!

In a nutshell, the gay-acting heterosexual male is my inspiration for coining the term Poppy-Seed Muffin.