You've all seen them by now. "This is a getting to know you e-mail! Copy this entire message, change the answers to ones about yourself, and then send it on to everyone you know!" They always end with "Say one nice thing about the person who sent this to you." They were trite two seconds after they first appeared, and they haven't improved.
So I was vaguely pleased to see the following reply to one of these GTKY e-mails in my inbox this morning:
LIVING ARRANGEMENT?
On tons of money with many beautiful women
WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
Penthouse Letters - a compendium
WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
Naked women.
FAVORITE BOARD GAME?
Any games (need not be a board game) with or related, however remotely, to naked women. e.g., drinking beer
FAVORITE MAGAZINE?
Playboy, Asian edition
FAVORITE SMELLS?
you guessed it
FAVORITE SOUNDS?
The sound of a lesbian orgy
WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD?
"where are the naked women in this party?"
BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD?
being with naked women
WHAT IS THE FIRST THING THAT YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?
naked women
ROLLER COASTER SCARY OR EXCITING?
Naked women are exciting
HOW MANY RINGS TO ANSWER THE PHONE?
it depends on how many naked women are home at the time
CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
i like vanilla on a naked woman
DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST?
only when fantasizing about naked cop women
DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL?
no on tons of money with many beautiful naked women
STORMS - COOL OR SCARY?
a lesbian orgy is COOL!
IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON DEAD OR ALIVE:
naked women, preferably alive
FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?
see question about board game above
DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI?
is this a euphamism for naked women? if so, then yes. Yes i do
IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Producer of lesbian pornography by heterosexual beautiful women
IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR?
colour does not count... who are we kidding...what matters is the number of naked women present
FAVORITE MOVIES:
Forbidden Love - The Unashamed Stories of Tina and Linda
ARE YOU A LEFTY OR A RIGHTY?
gotta use both hands when 2 or more women are present
SAY ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU:
DL is better than naked women