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The Best of The Week

A few years ago, I was teaching a college class on computer networking. We were running through the OSI model when we had a guest come through the door, followed by most of the office staff, several other instructors, and a trail of students who were hanging out in the hallway.

It was my birthday, but nobody at the college knew it. I'm not big on celebrating stuff like that unless it was for one of my family members. Someone decided to do something nice in a very public way.

A woman in a very tight latex fetishized French maid outfit barely covering her assets came over and gave me a large cookie bouquet. She said a few words in French, then switched to English with a heavy accent. She said a long stream of things that were double entendres, which had the whole classroom laughing as I turned a slight shade of red. The French maid gave me a big kiss on the cheek, leaving a brighter red lipstick outline of her lips, before she spun on her five-inch…

Carcinoma

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9.

“Pius Vincenti is in his last days, your Majesty,” Lutinus said to the Emperor. “You must appoint a successor.”

The boy looked from Lutinus to me. His eyes were bright and huge looking in the dim hall.

“The sickness has…” the boy began. He faltered and had to start over. “The head priest is sick?…

Several years ago my wife was walking around our five acres and discovered three pear trees covered with fruit. We ended up with a couple of bushels of pears. While I enjoy eating them, I don't like them that much.

My wife made a lot of delicious things from the pears, including a pear sauce she uses in some of her vegan dinners. She also made pear crisp, which helped me to get over my resistance to eating so many of them. It's…

News for Noders

September 16 Feliz cumpleaños Ancientsnow!

September 18 Happy birthday Stuart!

September 18 Stanislav Petrov has died.

September 19 Talk like a pirate day. Arrh!

September 27 Happy birthday Uberbanana!


Get ready for the Halloween Horrorquest, coming next month!

If you have an item for this calendar, /msg Tem42.


August 4 Happy birthday avalyn!

August 6 広島

August 27 Happy birthday Bitriot

If you have an item for this calendar, /msg Tem42.

July 1: Brevity Quest 2017 begins!

July 4: Alice’s Day (AKA Alice in Wonderland Day); also Independence day in the US.

July 19-24: Hemingway Days; party central is Key West, Florida.

July 31: Harry Potter's Birthday.


If you have anything to add to this calendar, let Tem42 know.

SciFiQuest 3017: The Frontier that Wouldn't End... hasn't ended. Still. See the quest node for details.

June 4: Aesop's Birthday.

June 11: TerribleAspect's birthday!

June 16: Bloomsday.

June 19: Juneteenth.

June 21: The first day of summer (northern hemisphere) and winter (southern hemisphere).

June 25 SciFiQuest 3017: The Frontier that Wouldn't End has ended.

June 28: Tau Day.


Get ready for Brevity Quest 2017, coming soon to a website near you!


If you have an item for this calendar, /msg Tem42.

April 1: April Fool's Day has been cancelled. Everyone just go home.

April 6: Happy birthday, borgo!

April 7: Happy birthday, Tem42!

April 12: Yuri's Night

April 22: It's Earth Day, fellow earthlings!

April 24: Happy birthday, Rancid_Pickle!

April 24: It's Arbor Day, Charlie Brown!


SciFiQuest 3017: The Frontier that Wouldn't End is coming May 1st!

If you have something to add to the monthly news, /msg Tem42.