New Utrecht H.S. aka
New Utter Reck aka
Newly
Erected Reck aka New Useless, located in the heart of
Guido-Land (an area of Brooklyn populated mostly by bigot Italians-see
Yusef Hawkins), is the
School of High to avoid when applying to a
h.s., getting off the
79st stop at the
B-line, or crossing the street to get to the
sweatshop. Coined by the teachers and faculty as,
"The School of Soft Cocks", due to the lack of excitement exhibited by the student body when being stimulated by
under-skilled,
psuedo-intellectual,
egotistical, teachers of the
pathological lying persuasion (
Mr. Dimentstein, Mr. Stratis), who
failed in life, yet seek a source of
livelihood that would support their
meaningless existence by
syphening the energy and talent from the
UTE's (students, alumni).
New Utrecht h.s. was also the setting for the sitcom "
Welcome Back, Kotter", back in its hayday in the mid-70's.
New Utrecht h.s. appeared in a
Saturday Night Live "Welcome Back, Kotter" skit featuring Adanoid
Sandler.
Graduates from New Utrecht who made it "BIG":
(supposedly) Mr.
Furley from Three's Company.
Hotspots (
Where the action is):
bathrooms, staircases, and the sidewalk. Dimenstein's room-
For all the aspiring gays.