Findings:
- He had a prison of brass built in the hole, and then, when it was finished, he locked up his daughter
- Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
- he was alive, and some of the other people, they were carbon copies
- Mr. Potato Head Sprouted. He got moldy. Now he's all dried up, but he's still up in the cabinet.
- She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
- He was confirming to himself that they were laughing with him after all
- The Abridged Edition: She was to one side, he was to the other, an untested bridge between them
- It was late when he came home; it woke you up
- I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
- How Candide Was Brought Up in a Magnificent Castle and How He Was Driven Thence
- "He was a terrible man," she sobbed, between bites of alimony
- When he was five, his father made him murder his imaginary friend.
- He stretched out his arms but she was not there
- The Marlboro Man died of cancer, but he wasn't a rocket scientist when he was healthy, ha ha ha.
- He was the kind of man who shacked up for shelter
- He made me promise I would do this when I was next sad. So I promised myself I would not be sad again.
- When he was little, he laughed in his sleep.
- All the while he was talking she was thinking what his whiskers would feel like on the back of her neck
- It wasn't until later, when I was washing the blood off my hands, I even knew they were dead
- They made the sunrise for people like us just so we have an excuse for why we're still up.
- I should ask my barber where he gets his hair cut, then go there and slowly make my way up the chain
- When that cow would walk it was like she was dancing
- So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
- I set my sister up with her husband, and all I got was this great dress and a trip to Hawaii
- Sometimes the apathy she saw made her want to curl up and cry
- He was an ant on an ill-defined mission. She was the trapdoor spider of love.
- I am sorry but when you were talking I was admiring the shape of your lips and evaluating their kissability
- There was a time when I got lost wherever I went.
- It was something that sand out while burning itself up, at the risk that nothing would be left.
- He was like the bottle of Champagne Krug
- The light on the bottom of the pool that you thought was real when you were a child
- when i wake up i can't remember what it was. it's so hard to smuggle something out of a dream.
- She was coming out as he was going in.
- He dreamt he was a bulldozer, she dreamt she was alone in an empty bed
- and when you woke up, your goldfish bowl was empty?
- She was a committed romantic and an anarcha-feminist. This was hard for her because it meant she couldn't blow up beautiful buildings.
- She bought a new smile every week when we first started seeing each other. Then I had to buy them.
- Jesus said, "I love him, for he is my brother." He was talking about everyone.
- Victor Hugo once got so mad he threw a baseball through a dog
- In a quiet grove of pines under a frosty sky, he helped her out of the sack. She wore severe white hospital pajamas and was beautiful.
- "You want to know the only thing you can assume about a broken down old man? It's that he's a survivor."
- I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
- She lights everything up. He glows in the dark.
- Mr. Lunch liked to chase birds. In fact, he was a professional.
- She had become a mutton for punishment and he was a wolf
- The girl didn't know if she was loved until he said yes.
- He's not cute, as in good looking, but he's got a cute psychosis
- When I woke up this morning, I thought I was a parallelogram. I still have a sneaking suspicion.
- He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
- Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
- She couldn't imagine that he liked dancing
- They hit each other, like fucking Christ intended!
- When she was new, she rolled around the sky like a black umbrella blown by the wind
- I got the feeling the Fairy Council was mad at me when the president knocked over her coffee to get a better grip on my neck
- Stand up for yourself, OR: How I got the shit kicked out of me
- Then again, maybe he was recruiting for a cult
- In the dream he laughs and says, You thought they were graceful on the ground
- he knew that victory is not about who is standing after the fight
- he looks a little like you... so i would rather talk about other pretty girls
- He made a felon of himself and ended up a box in our spare room.
- I didn't have the heart to tell him I was lying about taco night, but at least the hellhound made some friends
- Spikey the Werm may be a Werm, but he's got quite an imagination nonetheless!
- The class valedictorian was still tripping balls when he was bailed out in time to give the commencement speech at graduation
- She was pain and pleasure all at once, wrapped up in needles and Ramones T-shirts
- He was born with the gift of logic but the inability to use it
- It all burned up in the fire there was nothing left
- He was there, and then he wasn't, and with him went those memories
- You knew I was a rattlesnake when you picked me up
- I was into them after they were hip
- I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy
- I washed dishes with the Chinese FBI then was an extra in a cursed movie
- When she woke up, her hands were still dreaming
- It was something that sang out while burning itself up, at the risk that nothing would be left.
- And then night was here, after a day of measured breathing, and I could forget about breathing because the waiting was done
- I'm up, he sees me, I'm down
- It was daylight when you looked up from your ditch
- There was just the magic I'd brought and laid there over the years, piled up in the corners like twinkling dust bunnies
- When I was 21, he was building a Time Machine
- I fried myself in The Finnish E2 Get-Together, and all I got was a hippie song stuck in my head
- He was a man stuck between the objective and the subjective
- "The Americans in their wisdom have taken the heads off the pictures, enlarged them and superimposed them with the heads of animals and then strung them up all over the walls of the interrogation room," he said
- The Firestone dealership was full to the brim with cars. But I reasoned I would need a boat, since my desire was to go to Ireland. Just then a harsh reminder surfaced; water is expensive in hell.
- Most adults forget what it was like to be a child once they hit a certain age
- Even as he watched the sea rise up like anger
- She grew a little older, while he was telling her
- I remember when it was me who made you want to take over the world and enslave humanity
- He wasn't programmed to be a tenor, he was programmed to be a physician!
- She hit me like thunder, and I had to lie down until I could breathe again
- The boys did not know it. They were just being beautiful, and I got to watch.
- Of King Sigmund's last battle, and of how he must yield up his sword again
- I cried when he threw away the paper towel on top of the microwave
- They call you heartless, but you have a heart, and I love you for being ashamed to show it. You are ashamed of your flood, while others are ashamed of their ebb.
- Dust mop so magic she can not believe how fun it is to clean up after people
- sometimes, after an adventure, he likes to sit out there and think
- Kick up dust in the ruins of each other's souls
- More than he was willing to give
- I worked at summer camp, and all I got was this lousy case of gangrene
- Zip him back up, he sucks.
- They've Got the Guns but We've Got the Numbers
- So says the preacher man, but... I don't go by what he says
- he listened so well, he was still curious.
- He throws his heart down like a gauntlet
- I felt a need for some excitement tonight, so I drove up and down random streets yelling "I am one with the flying cows!" at regular intervals
- guess i got rung up (user)
- I turned Quizro into a Quiet Riot CD, and all I got was this jar of lemon-flavoured pickles.
- Why would he want a writer when he could have a dancer?
- He's got stacks and stacks of words that rhyme, describing what it is to lose
- I'm the only person who'd ever told him to his face he was beautiful.
- The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
- The Trial: Andrew Johnson was not guilty of the crimes for which he was impeached.
- Poetry you found that you wrote when you were ten but secretly still like
- I get knocked down, but I get up again
- He ain't no movie star
- The mites go up and the tights come down
- So I was drinking with the son of Man the other night, and...
- Carl Sagan threw down the gauntlet and Tyson picked it up and put it on.
- I have a face I cannot show, I make the rules up as I go
- What do girls think about guys when they catch guys staring at their breasts, but the guy is actually trying to read her shirt?
- How I almost got shot all up full of holes
- They will love him long after he is gone.
- I was Christian and all I got was this lousy painting
- I Dropped Out of School, and All I Got Was This Necklace
- My friend is dating someone who likes him far more than he likes her
- It is a strange thing to wake up every day and do things you care nothing about
- When the principal laughs so hard he can't suspend you
- Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex (But Were Afraid To Ask)
- I don't know where he gets his words but I like them
- Donald Duck was banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants
- It was 1992. He smiled.
- If a frog had wings, he wouldn't kick his tail when he jumped
- Wheresoever he went, there was Eden
- I wanted to see how many times he wouldn't ask.
- Sororities are nothing but social crutches
- All he left her was alone
- Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
- He thinks a path and travels the emptiness that was there
- their eyes meet for the first time, but they saw each other's hearts
- He wakes up everyday, puts an empty gun in his mouth, and pulls the trigger.
- They blew up the world, but what really pisses me off
- The virgin was looking apprehensive about the whole ordeal, but for the right amount of cash anyone will take on a horse
- The flowers smiled, but she was gone
- She doesn't know what he sees, but sometimes it makes his face beautiful
- Can we still like each other knowing the worst about each other?
- Why mirrors reverse left and right, but not up and down
- I stared into the muddled sky with tears running down my face in small rivers, and I knew then that there was no hope
- ships are safest in harbor, but they were made to sail
- Nothing Matters When We're Dancing
- I know them by the trucks they drive, the names they call each other, the tattoos on hot, shirtless days, the music they blast after lunch, to get through the rest of the day.
- They fed off each other, which is unusual in a couple, but nice to see.
- Where was that stooped and mealy-colored old man I used to call poppa when the merry-go-round broke down?
- Where was that stooped and mealy-coloured old man I used to call poppa when the merry-go-round broke down?
- He who wants to fight will find a club
- If they're going up to the sun, the stars and the moon, why don't they bring the moon down for us?
- Blue Got Up
- I went to Atlanta and all I got was this lousy pile of junk
- I Like Bananas Because They've Got No Bones
- I feel the way bank robbers must feel before they go out on that last job that ends up getting them all killed. That is to say, optimistic.
- The hostages wrote thank you cards to their captors when they got home.
- I spent one year in love and all I got was this lousy T-Shirt.
- I went to Voodoo Donuts and all I got was this lousy concussion
- When again between cities was comfortable and right
- got to be good looking cause he's so hard to see
- Everything you ever wanted to know about theatre tech, but were afraid to ask
- As I looked back, he was reveling in his own feces
- I Kissed "Weird Al" Yankovic and All I Got Was This Lousy T-shirt
- "Shut up," he explained
- The Lord of the Rings 1/2: Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Middle-earth But Were Afraid to Produce
- I never even went to Las Vegas, and all I got was this lousy t-shirt
- The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist
- "I see," said the blind man to his deaf wife as he picked up his hammer and saw
- An ocean away and here he was, seeping into her
- Shaymus is older than I thought he was
- I feel disillusionment creeping up on me like the day after a 21st birthday. A deep sigh of shallow disappointment.
- They wrote it all in perl but it was mostly system calls
- Oh, no. Look, you've gone and made me optimistic. I was before, but now it is showing.
- The Tesla Coil made me cry, but I got a free lunch out of it.
- Tom, He was a Piper's Son
- He Was a Crook
- he touched me then, but I forgot to feel
- I married him because he was not mean
If you Log in you could create a "Shit, they've got nothing for sixteen-year-olds in this town. You were drinking beer in Todd's basement, with uneven pool table. Joe and Peter showed up stoned and then you hit the highway (Glen drove. He was sober) and like that was the movie playing at the drive-in. You threw fries at each other and honked the horn between features when that 50s reel dancing wiener appeared. Later, Peter and Vivian got in a fight after she wouldn't go as far as he wanted down at the Coves, but they made up and on Monday you laughed your ass off about the movie" node. If you don't already have an account, you can register here.