Today an aunt of mine is celebrating her birthday. I've been avoiding calling her which is immature and irresponsible of me. After falling off the wagon for several days I've decided to face the music and climb back on again. I have a mental list of things to do that I'm going to write out. Yesterday I started sorting clothes in my bedroom. I've come to the conclusion that we have too many dish and bath towels. This makes laundry more frustrating and time consuming. What I can do is separate the ones we need and use on a regular basis and put the rest into storage. I'm not sure why I haven't done this sooner, I suspect it has something to do with my out of sight, out of mind mentality. Like I'm going to forget where I stored these towels and not have them when I want and need them.
I'm still impressed with myself for going to visit my dad after going out to eat with other family members. That was a very difficult thing to do. I did it, I had compassion on him, and I feel better for having had the experience. He's looked better, but he's also been worse. The other day I watched a neighbor of mine mow part of the lawn next door to her. The house has been standing empty for some time. Once the yard was mowed, but the weeds are now feet high. It's unsightly and bothers us all. I've been reading The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People and trying to frame things in light of what I'm learning. This isn't my problem and I'm not going to worry about it.
After going out on a date I asked him how he would define our relationship. He said he would get back to me on Sunday, didn't, and I called him out on it. It was a mistake to ask and I knew it as soon as I sent him the message. He made a mistake by not getting back to me when he said that he would. There were some tense moments between us, he still hasn't gotten back to me, but I don't really care anymore. Yesterday I sent him a message about walking the neighbor's dog. He sent me a message about hiking with his youngest and their dogs. There wasn't a discussion about burying the hatchet, but I feel much better about the situation. Him not getting back to me is a red flag, but I don't necessarily have to do anything about that right now.
Tuesday was a day of pep talks. I reached out to several friends, a woman I know reached out to me which was great. I received a pep talk and was able to give one to a friend who is struggling. She thanked me for my honest and realistic words, it was really nice to be able to support someone else instead of feeling like I'm always the one who needs a boost. The paperwork in my binder is overwhelming me. Today I'm going to get at least one thing out of there so I can move forward. Another thing I'm going to do is take some chairs I have in the garage to Goodwill since I'm not using them anyways. I want to talk to my ex about moving, but Summerfest is the busiest time of his year, I can wait until a better time presents itself.
A character of mine is a minimalist who is married to someone who confronts unpleasantness like cleaning out the fridge and just does it. This is the person I need in my life. The guy I like just does things whether he wants to or not. He gets a lot done this way, I admire that about him. Today is a good day because I'm sticking to the habits that have worked for me in the past. Get up without laying in bed for a while. Forget about being uncomfortable/tired/whatever and start doing things. Do things right away, be proactive instead of reactive. Remember that my feelings can be subjected so I can do things even when I don't feel like doing them. Very nervous about going to apply for a job, but I read in my book, went for a walk, did my interview, and am making progress in other areas. Just have to make my daily habits non-negotiable. I can do it.