Attempting the seemingly impossible and when to quit.
"Choose wood with no shakes, warps or knots!"
—my grandpa
We've all been in this position, one my maternal grandfather would describe "trying to make something with shoddy materials and broken tools". My most vivid recollection was back in my days as an IT trainer. It was a Monday morning, I was due to be running tech training at some borrowed training rooms in Nottingham. I got to work early enough to load a van with computers, monitors and whatnnot, ready for the day's acivities. I got to the training site (a local electrical goods store) and began unloading equipment, staged ready to put in the lift (training room was on th first (second to USians) floor of the building). At this point, someone managerial told me the lift was not working and that he'd assign some staff to help schlep stuff up the stairs. I had to think about this, reluctant to carry a couple of dozen heavy things upstairs, weighing it against the training of computer tech without actual tech. At this point in the story, the hero either has a brainwave, or is rescued by deus ex machina. There was no deus, so I went up, sat down and sketched out what a morning of training would look like. Eventually, as the training group began to wander in, my scheme was ready. We would roleplay the various parts of a computer and imagine the scenarios is which a component might go wrong, or a user fail to have understanding, allowing us to investigate diagnosic procedure and user management. It was a great success. After lunch and a fixed lift, we were able to continue with real technology. Meanwhile, I allowed myself a small preen as the students heaped praise on me for my ingenuity. All in all, I consider that in that case, I did manage to make a silk purse out of a sow's ear.
Not always, or even often, can one do this. Take a friend of mine who recently, in an act of real kindness, bought me a bag of coffee beans. The kind thought was uppermost in my mind as I noticed with dismay that, not knowing or understanding my coffee preferences, had bought me possibly the darkest-roast, glossiest beans I have ever seen. Never one to look a gift horse in the mouth, I dutifully weighed some out, ground them for my moka express and proceeded to make coffee. So bitter, it tasted of the worst of all regret and even steamed milk could not ameliorate the intense bitterness. What to do? I tried a second grind, a little coarser in the hope of extracting more of the earlier flavours (mostly fruity acidity and the volatiles) and less of the late-extraction bitter compounds. this made it less unpalatable, but still not great. I added a little pinch of salt, one of my anti-bitter everyday coffee hacks, and it was just about drinkable with steamed milk. It was rescued, but with reservations. As I sat to drink, I reflected on the kind soul who'd given me this, and philosophically enjoyed what I could. It tasted of kindness in the end. The failure was no-one's. Had I had a few Yirgacheffe beans I might have made the purse but alas it was not to be. I had done what I could and could do no more. Had it been totally unpalatable I would have had to quit there.
There is a reason I don't buy my beans like that. The sort of coffee some like, but is simply not for me. Also I long ago learned that good materials and understanding good tools, is the best solution to not having a problem in the first place. My grandfather taught me how to sharpen chisels, set saw teeth and shape screwdrivers, how to select good wood to work with ("no shakes, warps or knots!"), taught me the value of a well-setup plane and sandpaper. All these things together are likely to end in success, and minimise the chances of having to rescue a piece of work partway through. I'd like to think I would make him proud.
Someone recently wrote that they were going to buy new mugs to improve their coffee experience. I'd say they're trying to avoid really addressing the problem by buying themselves a moka pot and grinding their own beans. i'm about to start writing about coffee grinders soon, so I'll hush now.
This writeup came about after a stupid coffee disaster this morning. I started my coffee as usual, but noticed that, while the water in thepot was boiling, it was ot making coffee. i had forgotten to fit the filter and the gasket. i cooled teh pot, unscrewed the base and topped the water up a little and redistributed the grounds in the basket.Back on the hob and…Success! I had coffee. It wasn't the best cup I've made this week but i had clawed a small victory from the jaws of defeat. I award myself at least a rescued coin purse out of a crtain self-imposed sow's ear.
I do believe this is about coffee rather than pig's ears, so into that category with it. It's almost a 'how-to', but falls just short enough of that, so 'personal' it is. Part of me wishes i could have the type oscillate btween that and 'opinion', but my mind's made up.
$ xclip -o | wc -w
908